Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Worst Opening Sentence... 2009 edition
David McKenzie of Federal Way, Wash., won the grand prize in the 2009 Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest by penning what the judges considered the worst opening sentence for an imaginary novel. His dubious gem: "Folks say that if you listen real close at the height of the full moon, when the wind is blowin' off Nantucket Sound from the nor' east and the dogs are howlin' for no earthly reason, you can hear the awful screams of the crew of the 'Ellie May,' a sturdy whaler Captained by John McTavish; for it was on just such a night when the rum was flowin' and, Davey Jones be damned, big John brought his men on deck for the first of several screaming contests."
(From 10-28-09 Shelf Awareness report.)
There's plenty of others on the contest site. It takes work to create these!